My colonized newspaper

Fuck finesse, it's too hot for that. This morning's Montreal Gazette sez that Aaron McGruder's daily black strip Boondocks is coming to American idiot boxes in October. "No language policing in taking Boondocks comic to TV," the headline informs readers, breathlessly referring to how the N-word can be broadcast in the United States. (It's censored in print by prissy editors.)

Why bother buying a local paper that gives me only the American take, reprinted verbatim from the Dallas Morning News? Do the lazy asses at the Gazoo even care that we don't get the Yanks' Cartoon Network? Do they even know that Canadian television is heavily censored? Clueless fuckers. And then they freak when we call them irrelevant and stop reading them.

Canada has Teletoon, which has homegrown content, and what it buys comes mostly from the American WB and, less often, the Cartoon Network. This according to Melissa in Teletoon's audience relations department. She also says the station has finished up its fall buying, and Boondocks isn't on the list. There's always the possibility of a last-minute buy, but don't hold your breath.

The industry's self-policing Canadian Broadcast Standards Council would have a shit-fit if the N-word somehow missed being bleeeeeeped all to bits on our home and native airwaves. The council was set up to run interference between the cranky public and the real power, the CRTC. Complaints brought to the council, once dealt with, disappear.... and stations don't have to cope with CRTC sanctions when everything's been fixed up internally. Convenient, izzn't it?

I guarantee you the N-word will never be broadcast on a Canadian cartoon station. Canada polices not just naughty words, but naughty ideas and even bad taste. See here for an example of true stupidity (the last on the page). Under Canuck rules, intent is unimportant.

So we're not gonna hear the N-word, kids.

Many have reclaimed the word "queer." And "fag" and "dyke," robbing them of their sting. Changing what they mean, spitting the hatred back into the faces of the bigots, making fun of those who use what they think is a curse: Nigger, nigger, nigger. Get used to it. But not in Canada.